While it is likely that all divorces occurring on Long Island cause some emotional distress, some are extremely turbulent and cause more emotional harm on one or both spouses and their children than you might anticipate. If you find yourself in such a situation and fear for the physical or emotional health and safety of either you or your children, you may consider obtaining a temporary Restraining Order or an Order of Protection against your partner through the Nassau County or Suffolk County Court System.

As a Family Law attorney practicing in Nassau County and Suffolk County, NY, I see victims of Domestic Violence all too often. Domestic Violence is a serious problem in America. Every nine seconds a woman in this country is a victim of this crime. It’s the leading cause of injury to women, more than muggings, car accidents and rapes combined. Even more horrifying is that one in three women who are victims of homicide are murdered by their current or former partner.

Unfortunately, at our Long Island Family Law firm we see far too many situations in which a parent needs to protect him or herself, and/or his or her children from an abusive partner or ex-partner. Below are two options available to anyone who needs to seek protection from an abusive ex-partner.

Legal Definition of Domestic Violence

Domestic violence is a pattern of violent and coercive behaviors that occur multiple times, often daily. The behavior is directed to achieve and maintain power and control over someone in the home. It could be either a criminal or non-criminal act.  It could be mental or physical abuse of anyone in the house, not just the partner.  Examples of abusive behavior can include: power and control (giving punishments for “bad” behavior), verbal abuse (threats or ridiculing), physical abuse, sexual abuse, control, manipulation, harm to a pet, forced isolation, even controlling finances when coupled with the threat of violence is seen as Domestic Violence.  Constant calling or “checking in” isn’t violent itself, but can be a sign or signal of violence to come.

#1. File an Order of Protection:

What is an Order of Protection?

When people think of an Order of Protection most minds tend to jump to domestic violence cases. While these certainly occur, you do not have to have a pending domestic violence suit to obtain an Order of Protection in Nassau or Suffolk County, NY. An Order of Protection protects you and your family, and most importantly your children, from the harassing or threatening behavior of your partner. The individual against whom you have obtained the order can be prohibited from entering your home, workplace, and even the school your children attend. Orders of Protection can be particularly helpful in divorce cases. An Order of Protection can order your spouse to pay child support or even move out of the family home if you are both still residing together.

Are There Different Types of Orders of Protection?

Orders of protection do not come in cookie cutter form; they are individually tailored to meet the specific needs of your situation. Important to one seeking an Order of Protection are the outside circumstances that led one to do so. If there are instances of domestic violence in your relationship, you will need to file for the Order of Protection in the Nassau or Suffolk County Family Court. Keep in mind that in order to obtain an Order of Protection in family court, the individual against whom you are seeking the order must be either your spouse (current or former) or the other parent of your child.

Hopefully, you are not in a situation that involves domestic violence, and if that is the case, you will then need to obtain your Order of Protection through the Nassau or Suffolk County Supreme Court. In this case, your divorce attorney should attempt to obtain the Order of Protection while the divorce proceeding is ongoing by either making a motion to the court or orally requesting the order during a court proceeding.

Is an Order of Protection Right for Me?

Whether or not you need to obtain an Order of Protection against your spouse is a purely personal decision made based upon the facts of your unique situation. If there is domestic violence involved, obtaining an Order of Protection may be the first step to ensuring the physical safety of both you and your children. If you are not involved in a domestic violence situation, and you desire the Order of Protection to force your ex-spouse to comply with the divorce judgment, the decision may not be such an obvious one. You should consider why your ex-spouse is not complying with the divorce judgment; maybe he or she lost a job or has been having recent health problems.

How Will the Order of Protection Affect Your Children?

Also consider the effect that obtaining an Order of Protection against your ex-spouse will have on your children. If your ex-spouse already is not complying with the terms of the divorce judgment and failing to follow a child custody or child support arrangement, it is likely that your child is already aware of this and feels poorly. It would be important to consider how an Order of Protection would make your child feel; either good that his or her parent is now spending time with them or poorly because they know it is forced. Every child and every situation is different; there is no correct answer.

What if the Order of Protection is Violated?

If the individual disobeys the order and you call the police, there is the potential that he or she will end up in jail. While some classify an Order of Protection as “only a piece of paper” the threat of jail time for violating the Order often deters many individuals from doing so. However, jail is not always the solution a court finds appropriate to violations of an Order of Protection. Depending upon the circumstances and how often the Order of Protection has been violated, a court may determine that jail is not appropriate, but rather, will alter the existing Order of Protection to make it more effective.

If you think you are a victim of Domestic Violence, you do have rights and legal protections. Domestic Violence is a crime in all states, including New York. On Long Island, and throughout New York State a victim has the right to obtain an “Order of Protection”.

An Order of Protection, sometimes referred to as an OP, is a court order that will direct one party to stay away from the other, or, to refrain from engaging in certain activity directed at the other.  An Order of Protection may also contain additional instruction that the abuser must follow, such as refraining from visiting the place of business of the victim or refraining from any telephone contact, etc.

The Order of Protection will either direct the abuse to “refrain from” committing such acts, or, if the abuse is significant, to “stay away” from the victim entirely. If you want to press charges for assault, you have rights under criminal law as well. The law requires the police to arrest abusers who commit a felony or misdemeanor against a household or family member. Repeated offenders of this crime can receive four to seven years of prison time depending on the injury.

All Abuse is Not Physical

There is a common misconception that in order to qualify for an Order of Protection the abuse must be physical. While physical abuse such as punching, kicking, slapping and choking are certainly unacceptable and subject to an Order of Protection, other forms of abuse are also not tolerated. These other forms of abuse may take shape as emotional, mental or even financial abuse. All listed forms of abuse are patterns of behavior that can be dealt with in an Order of Protection in a Long Island court.

You can receive an Order of Protection by filing a Petition with a court of proper jurisdiction. Once the Petition is filed, the abuser will be served with legal papers. A county sheriff will personally serve the papers on the abuser so that the court can ensure the abuser receives notice of the Petition and has an opportunity to be heard at the hearing.

Temporary Orders of Protection Are Immediate

Immediately upon filing the Petition, a Temporary Order of Protection will be put in place until a hearing is held. This hearing could occur the very next time you appear in court, but it could also be held after a few more appearances. Whether the former or latter, the Temporary Order of Protection will remain in place until your hearing. Once a hearing is held, if a final Order of Protection is granted, it will be effective for two to five years. If the abuser violates either Order of Protection (Temporary or Final) the victim should immediately call the police. The abuser will be arrested and put in jail.

#2. Involve Child Protective Services in the Matter:

Child Protective Proceedings are initiated to determine whether a child is or may be in danger of abuse or neglect. Abuse is defined by Long Island courts as any behavior that results, or is likely to result, in serious physical injury to the child, or any sexual offense. If child abuse is suspected by anyone, including school faculty, doctors, social workers, or family members, the suspicion may be reported to Child Protective Services (CPS). If you believe that your partner or ex-partner may be abusing your children, you should immediately report it to CPS. If CPS determines that the child is the subject of abuse or neglect after its investigation, the appropriate action will be instituted in the Family Court.

Depending on the circumstances of each case, possible outcomes of Child Protective Proceedings may include placing the child in foster care while services such as parenting classes are provided to the abusive parent or the court may decide to release the child to a fit and willing relative who will care for the child. Some of the proceedings will require the parent or guardian address and correct problematic behaviors, such as anger management or substance or alcohol abuse.

While Child Protective Proceedings are some of the most sensitive matters involved in practicing Family Law, our Long Island Family Law Firm has had many years of experience assisting Long Island families in these matters. Parents are entitled to certain rights when it comes to their children, but the court’s first and foremost concern will always be the safety and well-being of the child. It is thus very important to have an experienced Family Law Attorney assist you in balancing these two doctrines so that both you and your child are safe and happy.

Don’t Wait. Protect Yourself from Domestic Violence Now

Get Your Free Consultation with an Experienced Family Law Attorney

If you have questions or need assistance with obtaining an Order of Protection against your spouse in Nassau County or Suffolk County, we can help. You shouldn’t have to face something like this alone. Because of the very sensitive nature of abusive situations, it is critical that parents seek the counsel of a Long Island Family Law Attorney who has experience representing families such as yours. Our firm is experienced in representing parents in both Order of Protection and Child Protective Proceedings. If you are involved in either situation, please call our Office at 631-923-1910 and schedule your free consultation with our experienced Long Island Family Law Attorneys.