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Cathy & Carl Versus Dana & David

Divorce Mediation Versus Contested Divorce on Long Island
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Below are two case studies comparing and contrasting the difference between Divorce Mediation and a contentious Contested Divorce. Cathy and Carl opted to keep their divorce civil and utilized Divorce Mediation to achieve and Uncontested Divorce. Their friends, Dana and David, went another route with a Contested Divorce settled in court.

Cathy & Carl’s Divorce Mediation

Cathy and Carl have been married for fifteen years and have three children together. Over the past few years, they have been having marital difficulties and have decided that they would be happier apart. They both work full-time and each have their own automobiles and retirement funds. The two do not have intense feelings of animosity toward each other; they just no longer make each other happy.

Cathy and Carl have been doing some research on different types of divorce, including Uncontested Divorces, Contested Divorces, Collaborative Divorces, and Divorce Mediation, and have reached the conclusion that Divorce Mediation may be best for themselves and their children.

Cathy and Carl find a Divorce Mediator they both agree on and begin their mediation sessions. Their mediator guides the pair through the numerous points of their divorce. They discuss maintenance, child support, child custody and visitation, health insurance and equitable distribution including retirement accounts, the marital residence, the parties’ cars and other personal property. There were certainly a few bumps in the road and challenges along the way, but, with the help of their mediator, Cathy and Carl were able to effectively communicate and compromise throughout the entire process.

After a few productive mediation sessions, Cathy and Carl’s mediator begins drafting a Stipulation of Settlement. The three exchange a few emails and phone calls with edits and revisions. Ultimately, Cathy and Carl finalize the Stipulation and give the mediator the authorization to file the Stipulation with the Court. The divorce mediator’s office then drafts and submits the Uncontested Divorce Submission Packet that must be filed with the court before a final Judgment of Divorce will be entered. After all the requisite paperwork is filed, Cathy and Carl obtain their final Judgment of Divorce.

Their post-divorce relationship is one that is amicable and cooperative. The two are able to calmly and respectfully communicate about the normal parenting issues in front of their children. They are able to work together and be flexible while raising their children. Their post-divorce relationship is a stark contrast to that of friends Dana and David who went through a highly Contested Divorce.

Dana & David’s Contested Divorce

Carl and Cathy’s friends, Dana and David, were just like them in how long they were married, the number and ages of their children and even their income. However, unlike Carl and Cathy, they couldn’t agree on anything and were unwilling to negotiate with the other. They wound up in a highly Contested Divorce.

Throughout the process of their Contested Divorce, Dana and David were “at each other’s throats.” They argued over most of the issues involved in getting a divorce. They couldn’t agree on how to divide their marital assets, who would have Child Custody, Child Support, Visitation, Spousal Support (alimony), and even health insurance.

Dana and David had to take their case to trial. This cost them tens of thousands of dollars and nearly two years of bickering between themselves and their lawyers. When their divorce was finalized, they believed they would be finally finished with each other, however, because they have children together, they will be in each other’s lives the rest of their lives.

Their contentious, and sometimes downright ugly, Contested Divorce cost them the ability to co-parent and communicate effectively when it comes to their children. This discord and animosity was, of course, not lost on the children, who ultimately bear the burden of their parents’ inability to co-parent.

While Child Support and Visitation may be over in several years, they will still be in their children’s lives, and that means they will be in each other’s lives. There will be graduations, weddings, grandchildren, etc. Dana and David are in for a lot of “uncomfortable” family events if they can’t learn to be in the same room together and communicate in a civil way.

Who Would You Rather Be: Cathy & Carl or Dana & David?

When you compare Cathy and Carl to the couple in the throes of a Contested Divorce, it is clear which situation is desirable. Deciding to divorce through mediation has many short-term, as well as long-term, benefits. Some of these benefits include less stress, less financial burdens, a quicker divorce and a better relationship with your spouse in your post-divorce life.

Want to Be Like Cathy & Carl? Call Us for a Free Consultation Today

Do you want to learn if you can get divorced quickly, inexpensively and with less stress than  a Contested Divorce? Contact the experienced Long Island Divorce and Family Law attorneys at Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. for your free consultation at 631-923-1910 today.

When you compare Cathy and Carl to the couple in the throes of a Contested Divorce, it is clear which situation is desirable. Deciding to divorce through mediation has many short-term, as well as long-term, benefits. Some of these benefits include less stress, less financial burdens, a quicker divorce and a better relationship with your spouse in your post-divorce life.

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Ann Masten
Ann Masten
17:48 12 May 20
I am a paralegal in an unrelated field of law. I phoned Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. today intending to refer a client to their office. Instead (and despite that we are the midst of the present crisis), Mr. Hornberger himself graciously accommodated my questions over the telephone, and was generous with his time and adroit in his response, saving our client a small fortune in unnecessary legal fees. I have not had any similar experience, in which counsel was so generous with his expertise, in 22+ years of interacting with prominent, local attorneys, and the client is overjoyed. Based on this experience, I would now whole -heartedly recommend this firm as trusted professionals to any client requiring a firm expert in family law and related legal issues.
Everett Roberts
Everett Roberts
14:30 18 Mar 20
Going through a divorce was very challenging and emotional. Searching for an attorney can be challenging as well when you consider everything that is at stake. The choice I made to work with Rob Hornberger was surely the best choice available. His professionalism, expertise, and understanding made him and the entire team perfectly suited to achieve the outcomes I desired. Rob was always available to answer my questions and give me advice and legal considerations that affected my situation. The support I received from his staff was exemplary as well. The staff was courteous, kind, and also very professional. Thank you so much Rob and team for a worry free experience.
Annemarie Cusumano
Annemarie Cusumano
21:41 17 Mar 20
Being in family court especially when your children are on the line is extremely emotional and stressful but working with Robert and Christine put me at ease and made the process as pleasant as a situation like that can be. I have a now 3 year old daughter (who is the most important person in my life) and I've been working with them for over two years since my daughter was 7 months old, the case has been up and down and through it all Rob and Christine have never given up. My original case was due to a neglect charge. Cps is not easy to work with, but Rob and Christine were vigilant and I ended up getting my daughter back within 8 months and did not have to plead guilty to the neglect. Currently I am in family court to figure out a custody agreement. They are professional, empathetic, and patient. They have always explained everything thoroughly, informed me of all my options and advised me of what my best option would be. They always respond quickly when I contact them with questions or concerns and most importantly they fight for me in court and don't give up even when things get rough. Before hiring Rob and Christine I met with other attorneys who did not make me feel confident or comfortable at all about my case, so I am very grateful to have found Rob and Christine and to be represented by such great attorneys. I highly recommend them for any family court matters and will definitely continue to use them in the future if needed.
Steven Frierman
Steven Frierman
02:25 07 Mar 20
After meeting with 3 different lawyers, we felt Robert understood us best and he genuinely had our best interests at heart. This helped us resolve a few minor issues in a timely fashion and make a potentially stressful situation go more smoothly.Thank you
Randi Gottlieb
Randi Gottlieb
18:47 03 Mar 20
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. - Mr. Robert Hornberger and his staff are beyond professional, they quickly gave me my consultation appointment, and helped me with an after-Divorce issue. Mr. Hornberger was empathetic and explained to me what I should expect. Mr. Hornberger was extremely professional and advised me of my options, he helped me proceed with accurate and smart decisions. I wish I had Mr. Hornberger and his highly recommended staff when I was getting divorced. I would highly recommend Robert and his staff to anyone who is getting a divorce or in need of help with situations after the divorce!

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