Select Page

6 Divorce Problems Men Face & How to Avoid Them

by | Nov 3, 2020 | Father's Rights, NY

Divorce is hard on both men and women, however, men tend to face some unique problems that they’re often not prepared for following the dissolution of their marriage. Here are 6 issues that men face when getting a Long Island divorce and how to avoid them.

#1. Men Typically Bypass the Grief Process

Unfortunately, men aren’t usually taught how to grieve or process difficult emotions. During a divorce, they may try to sidestep these feelings and the grieving process entirely.

Take Time to Grieve the End of Your Marriage

Understand that the end of your marriage is a difficult thing to go through, even if you initiated it and it’s the best decision for your family. Take the time you need to grieve the end of this part of your life. Honor that you had ideas and hopes for married life that won’t be fulfilled, even when it’s uncomfortable.

#2. Men Move Too Quickly In New Relationships

A sign of denying the grieving process is moving on to a new relationship too quickly and dating during the divorce. Often, men will seek comfort in a new relationship, whether it’s a casual relationship or immediately jumping into something serious.

Don’t Jump Into a New Relationship

Don’t give in to the temptation to numb the pain during the grieving process by jumping into a new relationship, even one that is meant to be solely physical. You deserve to reflect on what went wrong and what you can do differently so when you do enter a new relationship, you’re more stable and prepared.

#3. Men Begin to Lose Their Sense of Identity

It’s not uncommon for both parties in a divorce to lose their individual sense of identity when they’ve been a married couple for so long. Men may suffer more from this as their identity as a husband, father, and the provider of a household changes in the midst of a divorce.

Get to Know Yourself Outside of Marriage

Don’t be afraid to be alone for a period of time after your Long Island divorce. Use this opportunity to get to know yourself again, your likes and dislikes, and your strengths and weaknesses. Decide what you want for your life without the influence of other people’s ideas or opinions. Learn to practice good self care frequently and consistently.

#4. Men’s Physical Health Begins to Decline

Men are sometimes neglectful of their physical health and being married helps them stay on track with healthy meals and exercise by doing so with their spouse. Newly divorced men, especially if married for a significant length of time, may struggle to motivate themselves to live a healthy lifestyle.

Take Steps to Stay Healthy

After your divorce, do your best to make health and wellness a priority. Incorporate physical exercise and fresh foods into your daily routine as recommended by your doctor. Learn to cook simple, nutritious meals for one that don’t take too much time if you don’t already have good culinary skills, and make sure to get outside often for sunshine and fresh air.

#5. Fathers Aren’t Allowed Adequate Time with Their Children

Although New York courts have determined that it’s in the best interests of a child to maintain an equal relationship with both of their parents, mothers still tend to get preferential treatment when it comes to child custody rights. Fathers may face drastic, unexpected changes in how much time they have with their children as they go through the divorce process.

Fight for Your Rights to See Your Children

Often, men who are fathers face the difficulty of being awarded too little child custody or visitation with their children in their divorce. Not being connected to y children can make fathers feel lost, lonely, and purposeless. It’s important to fight for your right to equal legal and physical custody of your children with the help of an experienced divorce lawyer.

#6. Men Experience Financial Impact from Alimony & Child Support

Men are often the higher wage earners in a marriage, and as such, are typically required to pay alimony and/or child support. Unfortunately, this can put an undue financial burden on men who are also learning to live independently outside of their marriage.

Be Upfront About Your Income

Be upfront about your earnings, particularly if you’re demoted or lose your job and start earning less money. The court must calculate your alimony and child support based on your income and cannot take more than a certain percentage.

When to Call an Experienced Long Island Divorce Attorney

You should contact a seasoned Long Island divorce lawyer as soon as you begin considering the option of divorce or when your spouse serves you with divorce papers. Call Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. today for your consultation at 631-923-1910.



Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Schedule your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today. When you call, you’ll speak to our friendly Client Services Director, who will be able to answer your general questions and set up your appointment with an attorney who specializes in your unique case.

At your meeting, your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this meeting we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below to schedule your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.