fbpx
Select Page

Child Custody ‘Nesting’ Arrangements on Long Island

by | Sep 19, 2017 | child custody and support, divorce, divorce lawyer long island ny, News and Events

As an experienced Long Island Matrimonial and Family Law Attorney, I have seen all kinds of custody and visitation arrangements. Recently, a new trend in Child Custody has been emerging. Nesting Custody Arrangements have been getting more and more attention as they gain popularity among divorcing couples.

 

What is a Nesting Child Custody Arrangement?

Divorce Attorney Consultation

A Nesting Arrangement, in the context of custody, means that the children are the ones who stay put and the parents “fly” in and out of the home to care for the children. This could manifest in many different ways, but the children always remain in the home. Mom could be in the “nest” (children’s home) during the week, and Dad could be in the nest on the weekends. Maybe Mom stays at the home with the children Saturday night through Wednesday morning and Dad stays Wednesday’s after school through Saturday morning.

Again, the most important part of the Nesting Arrangement is that the children remain in the former marital residence. Having the parents be the ones to come and go means that they must maintain their own separate residence, typically an apartment, for the days when they are not with the children in the nest.

Top Considerations Before Deciding on a Nesting Arrangement:

The main concern for any family discussing a Nesting Arrangement is the cost. Not only does the former marital residence need to be maintained, but now both parents need to maintain separate residences on top of that. A total of 3 households need to exist in order for this arrangement to work.

Another top concern is the actual maintenance of the former marital residence. Someone needs to mow the lawn, clean the gutters, make sure the dishes are done, the den needs to be vacuumed, sheets and clothes need to be washed. Implicit in this need to maintain the children’s home is respectful and calm communication between the parents regarding housekeeping.

A hybrid of the two concerns is the financial maintenance of the former marital residence. The two parents will need to sit down and reach some kind of agreement regarding the finances associated with keeping the children’s home afloat, all while maintaining separate residences.

Pros of Deciding on a Nesting Arrangement:

Telling your children that you are getting a divorce is no simple or easy task. This discussion may be slightly easier, however, if you are telling them that their day-to-day lives will remain as stable as possible. Their clothes, shoes, homework, and sports equipment will all stay exactly where it is. There will be no shuffling the kids back and forth; they remain constant. They do not need to adjust to a new environment or a new school. It’s just like when one parent goes away for business and the other is left to care for the children. This stability is invaluable, especially while it may seem like everything else is changing. It’s also less stress on the children, as they do not need to live out of suitcases for most of their childhood, or worry about which pair of jeans are at which house, or be concerned that the soccer cleats will get left at Dad’s house, but the next practice is during Mom’s time.

Cons of Deciding on a Nesting Arrangement:

Among the top cons of deciding on a Nesting Arrangement are the finances and maintenance discussed above. It is no secret that living on Long Island is incredibly expensive. In order to be successful in your Nesting Arrangement, you need to be realistic. You need to ask yourself, and your spouse, can I/we make this work financially? Can I help maintain the children’s home while supporting myself in a completely separate residence? Can my spouse and I work together and perform the housekeeping functions of the former marital residence so that our children can live there comfortably? If you can answer in the positive for all of the previous questions, you might want to consider sitting down and having a real conversation about making a Nesting Arrangement work.

Additionally, some clients have come to me concerned that they will lose track of their things and remain wholly unorganized moving back and forth between two homes. My typical response, after years and years of seeing young children move back and forth between two homes, is that fully grown adults are better equipped to deal with the constant movement than children. While that concern is certainly valid, the parents who come to me with this concern are really stepping into the minds of their children in this regard. Imagine how confusing and stressful moving back and forth, on top of their parents’ marriage ending, is for your children. If you can alleviate some of that stress and avoid some of that change, it may be worth your temporary discomfort while you get used to your new arrangement.

Questions About Child Custody and Visitation on Long Island?

See this page to learn everything you need to know about Child Custody and Visitation on Long Island.

To learn more about what you need to know about Child Custody on Long Island, visit this page on Child Custody or contact us at 631-923-1910 for a complimentary consultation.

Need More Information About Nesting Custody? Call Us

If you would like to discuss this, or any, custody arrangement, please call our Long Island Divorce and Family Law firm at 631-923-1910 to schedule up your free consultation.

SCHEDULE YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Schedule your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today. When you call, you’ll speak to our friendly Client Services Director, who will be able to answer your general questions and set up your appointment with an attorney who specializes in your unique case.

At your meeting, your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this meeting we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below to schedule your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
rrezarta lekaj
rrezarta lekaj
20:47 24 Nov 21
Christine is truly the best there is. She is beyond professional, personable, genuine, extremely trusting, and has made such a stressful and emotional time for my family and I easier to get through. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for your guidance, your support, and being there every step of the way. I would highly recommend Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. to anyone that is in need for legal advice - you will be in the best hands.
Rob and Christine are the very best out there!I can not say enough about them. They both have helped me so much in different matters throughout the last several years . They have gone over and beyond!I highly recommend this law firm !
js_loader
Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
divorce questions answered
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
4.6
Based on 59 reviews
powered by Google
rrezarta lekaj
rrezarta lekaj
20:47 24 Nov 21
Christine is truly the best there is. She is beyond professional, personable, genuine, extremely trusting, and has made... such a stressful and emotional time for my family and I easier to get through. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for your guidance, your support, and being there every step of the way. I would highly recommend Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. to anyone that is in need for legal advice - you will be in the best hands.read more
Janine Martello D'onofrio
Janine Martello D'onofrio
21:00 02 Oct 21
Rob and Christine are the very best out there!I can not say enough about them. They both have helped me so much in... different matters throughout the last several years . They have gone over and beyond!I highly recommend this law firm !read more
Tara Tocci
Tara Tocci
20:59 17 Sep 21
I called to make an appointment for a consultation to discuss a mediated divorce, the office was fantastic with getting... me a prompt appointment. When going in all my questions were asked and I left feeling comfortable in my decision to move forward in using the Hornberger/Verbitsky office. Despite a pandemic going on the office still worked diligently to get my papers filed and my divorce complete in a timely manner. Highly recommend!read more
cristina romero
cristina romero
20:17 17 Sep 21
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C were phenomenal in every way. Robert was very genuine, patient and professional. Walking in,... I had no idea what to expect but he went above and beyond to explain the entire process thoroughly. He guided and informed me of my rights. Patty was amazing, she answered every question I had no matter how many times I called, she was very understanding. I highly recommend Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. Even if its just for questions on how to navigate this process.read more
Kerri
Kerri
16:57 17 Sep 21
Rob and his team are by far one of the greatest! Patty is amazing and will make sure all of your questions are... addressed and responded to. Rob and his team made a very tough time in my life as simple as possible. Rob is extremely knowledgeable and very empathetic. Patty was a pleasure to work with and I would recommend this firm to anyone that needs a great divorce attorney. Thank you for all of your help!read more
Angela Thearle
Angela Thearle
00:21 07 Aug 21
Hornberger law was the best choice I made when I needed to go to family court with my ex for custody of my children.... They were there at any time when I neeeded them. Going through a custody battle can be a huge emotional rollercoaster and very painful. They helped me through it and made it less painful and heartbreaking. And I got the outcome plus more than I expectedread more
Tammy Granville
Tammy Granville
11:49 04 Jul 21
Everyone was very professional. Never had to call to get an update on my case. Someone always updated me on a regular... basis.read more
LilMissPerfct Dessie
LilMissPerfct Dessie
06:46 11 Feb 21
I am a graduate of Norland English nanny college. I thank God every day that Mr. Robert Hornberger protected my clients... in the legal ways i could not. Children are a blessing not a blender to be fought over during some silly spat!read more
Anastasia R
Anastasia R
22:45 17 Dec 20
I went to see Rob for a modification for my child custody agreement to relocate, I can honestly say that working with... Rob and Christine has been the best experience. I cannot recommend them enough I only wish I had seen them sooner. They are prompt with communication, and they are honest which I appreciate so much. They do not give you fake promises and they do their best to fight for what you want which they do amazingly well! You can tell they are passionate about what they do and care about their clients. A very important aspect of lawyer client relationship for me is an open line of communication, the anxiety of the unknown always gets the best of us. The fact they were always available whether it be phone call or email to answer any question was extremely comforting and exactly what I needed. I am not well versed with laws and regulation so knowing I had Rob and his partners there when I was unsure or conflicted was extremely needed and greatly appreciated.When it comes to family court it's never easy but having Rob and his partner by my side I felt extremely comfortable and he helped me have realistic expectations. Please TRUST HIM!! If you're looking for a lawyer (at least for my end from child custody/Family Court) don't look any further you will not be disappointed. I hope to never have to use them again but in the event I have to, they are going to be my forever first call.read more
A Google User
A Google User
15:42 16 Sep 20
I hired Robert to handle a child custody and child support matter. He was prompt and professional and was able to... achieve a result that 3 prior attorneys could not. He and his staff made a stressful situation easy. I highly recommend his office.read more
Ann Masten
Ann Masten
17:48 12 May 20
I am a paralegal in an unrelated field of law. I phoned Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. today intending to refer a client... to their office. Instead (and despite that we are the midst of the present crisis), Mr. Hornberger himself graciously accommodated my questions over the telephone, and was generous with his time and adroit in his response, saving our client a small fortune in unnecessary legal fees. I have not had any similar experience, in which counsel was so generous with his expertise, in 22+ years of interacting with prominent, local attorneys, and the client is overjoyed. Based on this experience, I would now whole -heartedly recommend this firm as trusted professionals to any client requiring a firm expert in family law and related legal issues.read more
Everett Roberts
Everett Roberts
14:30 18 Mar 20
Going through a divorce was very challenging and emotional. Searching for an attorney can be challenging as well when... you consider everything that is at stake. The choice I made to work with Rob Hornberger was surely the best choice available. His professionalism, expertise, and understanding made him and the entire team perfectly suited to achieve the outcomes I desired. Rob was always available to answer my questions and give me advice and legal considerations that affected my situation. The support I received from his staff was exemplary as well. The staff was courteous, kind, and also very professional. Thank you so much Rob and team for a worry free experience.read more
Annemarie Cusumano
Annemarie Cusumano
21:41 17 Mar 20
Being in family court especially when your children are on the line is extremely emotional and stressful but working... with Robert and Christine put me at ease and made the process as pleasant as a situation like that can be. I have a now 3 year old daughter (who is the most important person in my life) and I've been working with them for over two years since my daughter was 7 months old, the case has been up and down and through it all Rob and Christine have never given up. My original case was due to a neglect charge. Cps is not easy to work with, but Rob and Christine were vigilant and I ended up getting my daughter back within 8 months and did not have to plead guilty to the neglect. Currently I am in family court to figure out a custody agreement. They are professional, empathetic, and patient. They have always explained everything thoroughly, informed me of all my options and advised me of what my best option would be. They always respond quickly when I contact them with questions or concerns and most importantly they fight for me in court and don't give up even when things get rough. Before hiring Rob and Christine I met with other attorneys who did not make me feel confident or comfortable at all about my case, so I am very grateful to have found Rob and Christine and to be represented by such great attorneys. I highly recommend them for any family court matters and will definitely continue to use them in the future if needed.read more
Randi Gottlieb
Randi Gottlieb
18:47 03 Mar 20
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. - Mr. Robert Hornberger and his staff are beyond professional, they quickly gave me my... consultation appointment, and helped me with an after-Divorce issue. Mr. Hornberger was empathetic and explained to me what I should expect. Mr. Hornberger was extremely professional and advised me of my options, he helped me proceed with accurate and smart decisions. I wish I had Mr. Hornberger and his highly recommended staff when I was getting divorced. I would highly recommend Robert and his staff to anyone who is getting a divorce or in need of help with situations after the divorce!read more
Rob Spielmann
Rob Spielmann
22:15 27 Feb 20
They made our process so easy. They were there to answer and help with any questions that came up. Very friendly
Ashley Hubner
Ashley Hubner
20:30 14 Feb 20
Navigating my divorce was a challenging experience to say the least, but I was supported and guided every step of the... way by my attorney, Robert. With the daunting task of hiring a divorce lawyer, I knew I would need someone with the right combination of knowledge, compassion and integrity. Robert has a strong background in family law, sincere character and direct communication to be superior to the others. He and his staff were professional and caring. I always felt I was in good hands. I highly recommend the Law Offices Hornberger and Verbitsky for the legal expertise, compassion and understanding of the many complex facets associated with divorce.read more
Thomas Livingston
Thomas Livingston
21:31 26 Jan 20
Robert and Christine are the epitome of professionalism. They helped us with the purchase of our new home. They were... efficient, dedicated, and focused on making our closing as seamless as possible.read more
Sheila Vasata
Sheila Vasata
23:35 14 Jan 20
Robert Hornberger has been a friend of mine and my family for years. He has helped us all in ways that are too... numerable to mention. I went through a divorce that I don’t think I could’ve done if I didn’t have Robert by my side. He is vivacious, motivated, knowledgeable, and has an extreme desire to succeed and excel...and he does! He goes over and above for all of his clientele. I would recommend his law firm to anybody who is looking for a Great Lawyer with integrity!read more
Next Reviews
js_loader
   

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.