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What Not to Do Before Getting a Divorce on Long Island

by | Jun 4, 2019 | divorce, divorce lawyer long island ny, News and Events

Your actions before your divorce can have a significant impact on the process of dissolving your marriage on Long Island. You could put yourself at a financial disadvantage or make it more difficult for the judge to sympathize with you. Here’s what you shouldn’t do before getting a divorce — and one thing you should.

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Don’t Continue to Add Money to a Joint Bank Account

Once you decide to get a divorce, it’s important to open a new bank account in your own name and keep your money there. Deposit cash given to you as a gift, paychecks that you earn, and any other money that you make into your new account. Understand that your spouse can legally drain your existing joint bank account at any time, even after you agree to get a divorce, so you could end up losing everything if your spouse decides to be spiteful.

Don’t Hide Assets

Although you want to keep your money in a separate place from your spouse’s, it’s important that you don’t try to hide it or other assets. You’ll need to make full disclosure about any money you have in the bank, as well as what valuable assets you may have, including furniture, jewelry, vehicles, appliances, etc. Hiding assets in a divorce could lead to serious penalties.

Don’t Have Your Spouse Served Publicly

How your spouse is served with their divorce papers (if you’re the one filing the petition) can impact how they approach divorce negotiations. If you have your spouse served publicly, they may be embarrassed by the situation. They may become more bitter toward you and less likely to want to work things out. They may attempt to make things more difficult for you or refuse to compromise with you in anger or to get back at you for publicly humiliating them. Have your spouse served privately, at their own home, if possible.

Don’t Fight Every Battle

When it comes to divorce, few people win every battle. It’s important to look at what you and your spouse disagree on and choose to fight for what is most important to you. Fighting every battle out of spite or simply for the sake of fighting does more harm to everyone involved than good. It also slows down your divorce process and prevents you from moving forward with your life sooner. Time is money, so the longer your divorce takes, the more it is likely to cost as well.

Don’t Seek to Get Revenge

Divorces are painful, emotional situations that can bring out the worst in anybody. If your spouse has hurt you deeply or damaged you in some other way, it may be tempting to devise ways to get revenge. Often, this comes out in little ways, like trying to deny child visitation or refusing to compromise on certain things. Or, it can come out in acts of bitterness, like throwing your spouse’s property out in the front yard or spray painting “cheater” on the garage door.

These acts may make you feel better temporarily, but they won’t do you any favors in court. You’ll appear bitter, irrational, and immature, which can make the judge less likely to sympathize with you or rule in your favor.

What You Should Do in a Divorce on Long Island

Whether you’re in the thick of a divorce or you’re simply considering it as an option, your best ally is an experienced Long Island divorce lawyer. Contact our family law firm today to learn more about how an attorney can help you take the best course of action as you separate from your spouse. Call today to schedule your free consultation at 631-923-1910.

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Schedule your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today. When you call, you’ll speak to our friendly Client Services Director, who will be able to answer your general questions and set up your appointment with an attorney who specializes in your unique case.

At your meeting, your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this meeting we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

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There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below to schedule your free consultation and case evaluation.

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Everett Roberts
Everett Roberts
14:30 18 Mar 20
Going through a divorce was very challenging and emotional. Searching for an attorney can be challenging as well when you consider everything that is at stake. The choice I made to work with Rob Hornberger was surely the best choice available. His professionalism, expertise, and understanding made him and the entire team perfectly suited to achieve the outcomes I desired. Rob was always available to answer my questions and give me advice and legal considerations that affected my situation. The support I received from his staff was exemplary as well. The staff was courteous, kind, and also very professional. Thank you so much Rob and team for a worry free experience.
Annemarie Cusumano
Annemarie Cusumano
21:41 17 Mar 20
Being in family court especially when your children are on the line is extremely emotional and stressful but working with Robert and Christine put me at ease and made the process as pleasant as a situation like that can be. I have a now 3 year old daughter (who is the most important person in my life) and I've been working with them for over two years since my daughter was 7 months old, the case has been up and down and through it all Rob and Christine have never given up. My original case was due to a neglect charge. Cps is not easy to work with, but Rob and Christine were vigilant and I ended up getting my daughter back within 8 months and did not have to plead guilty to the neglect. Currently I am in family court to figure out a custody agreement. They are professional, empathetic, and patient. They have always explained everything thoroughly, informed me of all my options and advised me of what my best option would be. They always respond quickly when I contact them with questions or concerns and most importantly they fight for me in court and don't give up even when things get rough. Before hiring Rob and Christine I met with other attorneys who did not make me feel confident or comfortable at all about my case, so I am very grateful to have found Rob and Christine and to be represented by such great attorneys. I highly recommend them for any family court matters and will definitely continue to use them in the future if needed.
Steven Frierman
Steven Frierman
02:25 07 Mar 20
After meeting with 3 different lawyers, we felt Robert understood us best and he genuinely had our best interests at heart. This helped us resolve a few minor issues in a timely fashion and make a potentially stressful situation go more smoothly.Thank you
Randi Gottlieb
Randi Gottlieb
18:47 03 Mar 20
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. - Mr. Robert Hornberger and his staff are beyond professional, they quickly gave me my consultation appointment, and helped me with an after-Divorce issue. Mr. Hornberger was empathetic and explained to me what I should expect. Mr. Hornberger was extremely professional and advised me of my options, he helped me proceed with accurate and smart decisions. I wish I had Mr. Hornberger and his highly recommended staff when I was getting divorced. I would highly recommend Robert and his staff to anyone who is getting a divorce or in need of help with situations after the divorce!
Rob Spielmann
Rob Spielmann
22:15 27 Feb 20
They made our process so easy. They were there to answer and help with any questions that came up. Very friendly


  • I have known Robert for more than 8 eight years. Robert has represented many of my family and friends. Each and every one has raved about Robert’s professionalism and expertise. He is knowledgable, friendly and truly cares about his clients. I would not hesitate to continue to refer Robert and his firm in the future!
  • I’ve known Robert for most of my life, and feel very fortunate that I have been able to turn to a good friend for various kinds of legal advice. He is very intelligent, straight forward, and professional. Most importantly though, Robert always finds the fastest resolution, and will not waste your time or money. He is NOT in the habit of dragging things through litigation if there is no need for the added expense. I have referred a few of my friends to Robert, and they have all been more than satisfied in their experience with him. Highly recommend!!



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