Divorce Mediation Services, Long Island, NY
As a Long Island divorce mediator and divorce attorney, we know that divorce mediation offers a better way to end your marriage and move on with your life by minimizing the emotional and financial strain that often accompany other types of proceedings. Our Long Island divorce mediators’ goals are always to keep the process of ending your marriage from becoming adversarial and enable you to complete the process quickly, easily, inexpensively and with the least amount of stress on all the parties involved, including your children.
Long Island Divorce Mediators Keep Your Divorce Private
Divorce mediation with the law firm of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is a private, voluntary process that helps you resolve the issues involved in ending your marriage without the time, stress and expense of litigation in court. Our experienced divorce mediators help guide you through this process without taking sides or imposing any decisions upon you or your spouse.
At Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. a divorce mediator will help encourage honest and open discussion between you and your spouse about the important issues you need to resolve in order to move on with your lives. We help you find common ground and we encourage you to work together to find the best solutions for both of you. We don’t impose solutions; rather, we guide you to help you make your own decisions about how best ways to resolve the issues involved in ending your marriage.
Divorce Mediation is Best for Your Children
The end of your marriage can be an emotional, difficult and scary experience for your children. They are naturally confused by what’s going on and likely don’t understand why mom and dad can’t live together anymore. Often they feel guilt over child custody issues when they are made to “take sides” with one parent against the other. In a traditional, litigated divorce, children all too often become victims of the process. They often are subject to witnessing the constant battle their parents have with each other over such issues as child support, custody, visitation and who gets to spend weekends or holidays with the them. This eventually ends with one parent having custody over the children and the other getting only visitation rights. At times, children also may feel as though they have to pick sides in the battle, making decisions like picking with which parent they want to spend their birthday or holidays. Such seemingly simple decisions can put a great emotional strain on a child. While you may not realize it, this can have detrimental effects on your children, and you should try your best to avoid putting your child in such situations. Unfortunately, divorce litigation tends to amplify these issues and pull the child into them, rather than minimize them and keep the child out of them.
Divorce mediation provides an often more successful method of dealing with these issues because it removes the adversarial nature of the proceedings. In divorce mediation, there is no such thing as Child Custody or Visitation Rights, rather, you and your spouse have the opportunity to sit down and amicably discuss what is best for your children, custom tailoring your parenting plan to the specific needs of your children and your family. You get to decide what’s best for your child or children rather than putting it in the hands of the Suffolk County or Nassau County Courts, which can lead to one partner feeling mistreated and angry, which spills over to the children.
As an example of the flexibility mediation can offer you, on occasion, couples in divorce mediation agree not to have a formal custody agreement. In such cases, rather, you and your spouse may agree to take each week as it comes depending on your schedules and the schedules of the children. In these instances, the child may spend four days with you and three days with your spouse one week, and spend the entire next week with your spouse if you wind up having to work late or go out of town for whatever reason. This also allows a child to not feel as though he or she has to pick which parent he or she wants to spend time with because you and your spouse are splitting time evenly according to your schedules. This is contrary to a traditional court ordered visitation agreement, where you or your spouse may have the children one week but yet also have other commitments during that same time period and therefore miss out on precious time together.
Divorce Mediation: The Compassionate Alternative to Litigation
- Divorce Mediators and Divorce Mediation Long Island, NY
- Tailored to Meet Your Family’s Needs
- Confidential & Private
- Considerably Less Expensive than Litigation
- Compassionate Assistance from Start to Finish
- Post-Marriage Assistance
- On Your Time Schedule
- Free Consultation
- Fixed Fees
Divorce Mediator with a Proven Divorce Solution
Divorce Mediator Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., offers a proven solution for Long Island families like yours because it enables both you and your spouse to participate in the process and encourages you to focus on problem-solving rather than court room adversity.
Our divorce mediators focus on your family and your relationships, as well as your family finances and the long term well-being of you, your spouse and your children. Our process is geared to help you rebuild the foundation for a strong family bond, while best positioning you to move forward with your life. Most importantly, the proven divorce mediation techniques a Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. divorce mediator will employ will keep the focus on resolving your issues, rather than escalating the tensions and resentment that often become a part to conventional court proceedings.
To learn more about Divorce Mediators on Long Island and how they can save you time, money and stress, visit this page: Divorce Mediator Long Island | Nassau County & Suffolk County or this page, How Divorce Mediation Works. At Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., our Long Island divorce mediators help couples end their marriages and move on with their lives at a fraction of the cost of a typical litigated matter using proven mediation techniques and strategies. Contact a divorce mediator today at 631-923-1910 to for a free divorce mediation consultation to talk to us about how we can help you move on with your life faster, less expensively and with less stress for you, your spouse and, most importantly, your children.
Top 10 Ways to Get the Most from Divorce Mediation
Many couples in New York who opt to dissolve their marriage do so via divorce mediation. Mediation differs from traditional litigation in several ways; namely, you and your spouse won’t go to court. Instead, you’ll both meet with a neutral third party who will help you talk out your divorce settlement. Once you and your spouse reach an agreement, your attorney will file for a judge to approve the divorce decree on your behalf.
Here are some tips to help make mediation easier and more effective, and how you can get experienced legal help when you need it most during a Long Island divorce.
#1. Be Prepared to Participate in Your Divorce Mediation
It’s easier to take a backseat and let your attorney do the talking when going through the process of divorce litigation than it is to do so during mediation. During mediation, both you and your spouse should be prepared to fully participate. This is your divorce; your divorce mediator, who may be a family law attorney, is there to guide you and your spouse to reach the best agreement for both of you.
#2. Be Ready to Make (Some) Compromises During Mediation
It’s usually not possible to get everything you want in your divorce, especially if you’re mediating the dissolution and are interested in avoiding litigation if you can. Be ready to make some compromises and think about what issues you are most willing to negotiate. Offer these up for negotiation first, leaving the things you really don’t want to budge on off the table.
#3. Have Copies of All Important Documentation Available At Mediation
Your mediation will go more smoothly if you have copies of important documents like bank account statements, tax returns, property and assets, etc. ready to go. Call ahead to find out what you need to bring and ensure you have enough copies for yourself, your spouse, and your divorce mediator.
#4. Set Reasonable Goals for Divorce Mediation
The goal of divorce litigation is to “win”, often at any cost. However, this isn’t necessarily the best approach for divorce mediation. Look for ways to create reasonable goals, such as sharing child custody or reaching an agreement on the length and amount of alimony that works best for both parties. Your win in divorce mediation is to get your divorce over and done with more quickly, less expensively and, hopefully with an amicable relationship with your ex so that you can move on to a happier, more fulfilling life with less stress during the divorce process.
#5. Be Civil and Respectful When Communicating with Your Spouse During Mediation
During mediation, be respectful and civil when communicating with your spouse and the mediator. If you and your spouse aren’t on speaking terms or can’t be in a room together without fighting, mediation may not be the best option to resolve your divorce.
#6. Create a Compelling Case
Long Island courts typically make decisions in divorce cases that are in the best interests of children or a lesser earning spouse. When going through the process of mediation, it’s important to make your case appear as compelling and persuasive as it can be. Your lawyer can help you present accurate information in the best possible light.
#7. Look for Creative Solutions to Problems During Mediation
Don’t be afraid to offer or discuss creative solutions to issues you and your spouse are facing. Although a potential solution may look unconventional, such as a male spouse being awarded primary custody, it may be the best resolution for the family.
#8. Exercise Patience with the Divorce Mediation Process
While mediation typically allows couples to dissolve their divorce amicably faster than litigation, it may still take several weeks or months to negotiate a settlement that you and your spouse both agree upon. Be patient with the mediation process and discuss any questions or concerns you have with a trusted Long Island divorce lawyer.
#9. Get Professional Emotional Support During Divorce Mediation
Both divorce mediation and traditional divorce litigation can be emotionally draining, especially if you have children and are dealing with child custody and support issues. Consider obtaining professional counseling, group therapy, or other mental health support while going through the process of divorce mediation to help you manage your own feelings about the split.
#10. Contact an Experienced Long Island Divorce Attorney
A mediator can help you and your spouse reach an agreement about various aspects of your divorce, but they cannot provide you with legal advice or inform you of what would or wouldn’t be in your best interests. This is why you and your spouse might each want to have your own attorneys review any divorce agreement that comes out of your divorce mediation process.
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Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.
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There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.