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4 Tips to Improve Communication to Save Time & Money in Your Long Island Divorce

by | Jul 10, 2018 | divorce, divorce lawyer long island ny, News and Events

Divorce often becomes overwhelming quickly. People going through a divorce on Long Island are dealing with financial, legal and personal decisions that seem to never end. Naturally, this is a very emotional time for everyone involved, which inevitably leads to difficulty seeing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and that your divorce will not go on forever. The ultimate key to reducing the stress, length and expense of your divorce is communication. For many spouses, communication can either be the downfall or the saving grace of their divorce. Clear, open and honest communication can really save you time, money and aggravation. Below are four tips for improving communication during your Long Island Divorce.  

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#1. Remember: What’s Done is Done

For most divorcing couples, divorces are accompanied by extreme and varying emotions. This is completely natural and to be expected. The issues that prompted a divorce are often sensitive and can cause different degrees of emotions. In this regard, it can be difficult to resist lashing out and make your spouse “pay” for whatever he or she previously did. We spend many hours of the day trying to help clients remain in the moment and focus on the issue at hand. Putting your blinders on and ignoring whatever happened in the past is usually easier said than done, but if possible, it can really make a difference during your divorce proceeding.

#2. Set Boundaries with Your Spouse

Your divorce will naturally cause you to adjust many aspects of your life. How, when and how often you communicate with your spouse are just a few of many aspects that will change. During your divorce, it’s very important to set certain boundaries with your spouse to ensure that you are both treating each other with respect and are moving toward the most amicable resolution possible. It’s important to discuss how often you are comfortable communicating with each other, by what methods and what topics may be off-limits. For some, emails are the best way, while for others the Family Wizard software is a must, and for others quick texts and phone calls are manageable. Some spouses are constant communicators and need to be in touch all day, while others can make do with weekly updates. Regardless of which situation works best for you, it is important that you communicate this with your spouse.

#3. Stay Off Social Media

One of the most sure-fire ways to raise emotions during a divorce is to take to Social Media with your complaints. We drill it into our kids all the time, but many forget the same rules apply to the adults – nothing is private and whatever you post online is out there forever. Nasty posts always make their way back to the attorneys representing you and your spouse and they do nothing but cause more problems for your case. Additionally, courts can look at your Social Media pages, and what you post may be brought up in court. I usually advise my clients to avoid all forms of Social Media at all costs, at least until your divorce is finalized.

#4. Be Careful What You Share With Third Parties

When going through an emotional process such as a divorce, it is natural to look to your support group and lean on them. However, it is important that you be careful with whom you share information. Unfortunately, during trial, your spouse’s attorney can subpoena your friends, family members, neighbors, co-workers, and anyone else they believe may have relevant information for the court. Therefore, it’s important to keep your circle tight, and keep those negative comments to yourself as much as possible.

Have More Questions About Communication During Your Divorce? Contact Us

If you have further questions regarding communication during your Long Island Divorce, we can help. Contact our Long Island Divorce & Family Law firm at 631-629-2545 to set up your free consultation with one of our experienced Family Law attorneys.


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