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The Ultimate Guide to Navigating Divorce on Long Island, NY

The Ultimate Guide to Navigating Divorce on Long Island, NY

The Ultimate Guide to Navigating Divorce on Long Island, NY

Every divorce is different, but in terms of the legal proceedings, there are some commonalities that run through each case. Whether or not your divorce is contested or uncontested, it is crucial to understand the process of filing for and finalizing divorce on Long Island, NY. This guide will share some of the most important strategies, tips and tricks to ensure your divorce process goes as smoothly as possible.

Free New York Divorce Lawyer Consultation

6 Tips for a Successful Long Island, NY Divorce

Navigating divorce on Long Island, NY can be challenging, but these six tips from our experienced team of divorce lawyers, can set you up for success.

#1: Consider Your Options

Married couples have three legal options to begin to end their marriage in New York: legal separation, annulment, and divorce. Legal separation is not the same as physical separation, and it addresses many of the same issues that standard divorce proceedings do (including finances, custody, and property). However, the couple remains legally married.

Why consider legal separation? If one spouse is not a U.S. citizen, divorce could risk deportation. Other couples opt for legal separation due to religious reasons. There are financial benefits as well, such as keeping health insurance and filing taxes jointly. If none of these factors influence you, however, a more typical divorce might be the right choice.

#2: Decide Whether You Need a Contested or Uncontested Divorce as Early as Possible

There are essentially two types of divorces in New York: contested and uncontested. In a nutshell, an uncontested divorce can occur when both spouses want to get a divorce and fully agree about child custody, finances, and property distribution after the divorce. While most divorces in New York state are contested, uncontested divorces typically do not require litigation. That said, even if you and your spouse are in full agreement on the terms of your divorce, it’s important to hire an experienced divorce lawyer to represent you. Divorce agreements are complex, legally binding documents that can have far-reaching consequences for you and your family for years to come. Only an experienced divorce attorney will know and understand all the myriad of questions to ask and issues to address to ensure you and your family are fully protected and you are not blind-sided by some unforeseen circumstance in the future.

If you do need a contested divorce, that means that you and your spouse either disagree on the desire to get a divorce; the grounds for the divorce; or what will happen to your children, finances, or property after the divorce. If your divorce is contested, we highly recommend that you find an experienced divorce lawyer to represent you as soon as possible. Contested divorces can become fraught with issues and contentious quickly and it’s best to have qualified representation before you unwittingly create more problems for yourself that can’t be undone.

#3: Think About Child Custody Arrangements

If you and your spouse share children, it is important to think about how you will manage custody after your divorce takes place. There are two types of child custody in New York: physical and legal. Legal custody refers to the right to make major decisions about your child, whereas physical custody refers to whom the child lives with on a day-to-day basis.

Judges will account for numerous factors in their custody decisions, including who has been the primary caretaker previously, the quality of each parent’s home environment, and more. The guiding principle in child custody decisions in New York state is “the best interest of the child”. If you want to gain (or regain) custody of your children, it’s important to ensure you will have a safe and stable home environment in which they can live.

#4: Determine Your Net Worth

One of the most contested issues in Long Island, NY divorces is finances: who will pay or receive spousal support, how property will be divided, what to do with joint savings accounts, debts, retirement accounts and more. Before getting divorced, it is a good idea to determine your net worth so that you have an idea of where you stand financially. This will also help your attorney and the court negotiate appropriate payments.

#5: Ensure Your Safety After Filing for Divorce

In situations involving abuse on Long Island, NY, your and your children’s safety must come first. If you are concerned for your safety, you should file for an Order of Protection to keep your spouse away from you and your children, if you have them. This extends to not only physical violence but also emotional, verbal, sexual, and financial abuse. Taking steps to protect yourself as you file for divorce is essential, and you must make this your first priority.

#6: Choose a Trusted, Experienced Divorce Lawyer to Represent You

As you navigate a contested divorce on Long Island, NY, legal representation is essential to ensuring that you and your best interests are protected. It is crucial to select an experienced divorce lawyer, like our team at Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., who has handled thousands of cases like this before. You need an ally to look out for your interests, and that is the role of your divorce lawyer.

Choose Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. When You Need Trusted Legal Advice for Your Long Island, NY Divorce

As you navigate divorce on Long Island, NY use these strategies to help you achieve a successful outcome for your family. For a more comprehensive guide, download our free e-e-books, “New York Divorce Guide” and “Successful Divorce Strategies”. When it comes to Long Island, NY divorce, our team has seen it all and developed strategies to ensure your rights are protected now, and in the future. Contact us to learn more about your legal options or book a free initial consultation to discuss your case in detail. Call now at 631-923-1910 or complete our short contact form, and we’ll get in touch with you to schedule your case evaluation.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today. Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation. All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

Spouse Preventing You from Hiring the Attorney You Want?

Spouse Preventing You from Hiring the Attorney You Want?

Spouse Preventing You from Hiring the Attorney You Want?

Is Your Ex ‘Conflicting Out’ Attorneys from You?

You and your ex are on the path to divorce, but every attorney you speak to says they cannot help you because there’s a conflict with them representing you? What is happening?

It’s a dirty, underhand divorce trick that makes it more difficult for you to work with the best Long Island, NY divorce attorneys. This divorce tactic is called “conflicting out”, and it can make it very difficult for you to get the legal help you need.

Free New York Divorce Lawyer Consultation

What Does ‘Conflicting Out’ Mean?

Conflicting out means that your ex has contacted an attorney, often sharing some or a significant amount of the divorce details with that attorney. Once they do that, there’s a level of attorney-client privilege present. If you approach that same attorney requesting legal assistance, the attorney cannot represent you. Doing so could create a conflict of interest. This conflicting out trick can seriously hurt a person’s right to fair legal representation.

Some spouses may call all of the best divorce lawyers in Long Island, NY, simply in spite of you. All they need to share with the attorney is enough personal information to establish that attorney-client relationship. They choose one to ultimately work with, but because they’ve spoken to so many (or even all) of the divorce attorneys on Long Island, it makes it impossible for you to get help.

What to Do If You’ve Been Conflicted Out

It’s frustrating and limiting, but there are some strategies to help you if your spouse attempts to use this trick. Remember, it’s not the attorney’s fault because they are bound by the law. Although we do not charge for consultations because we believe it’s important to find the divorce attorney that best matches with you, this “conflicting out” process is one of the reasons many attorneys charge for consultations. Your spouse is less likely to set up multiple consultations if they have to pay for them. We can help you get legal guidance through all stages of divorce.

Keep Proof and Present it to the Judge

One of the most impactful ways you can turn this around on your spouse is simply to collect the data from each attorney, document it in any way possible, and present it to the divorce court. You could keep a list of each attorney you call who tells you that they cannot represent you due to a conflict of interest.

Then, show that this has hurt you. Having this evidence may prove abusive behavior by your ex. The divorce attorneys at Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. would never encourage our clients to employ this divorce tactic.

Seek out a Divorce Attorney on Long Island, NY Immediately

This is one of the reasons we recommend that you contact a reputable divorce attorney immediately upon discovering, or even suspecting that your spouse may be seeking a divorce.

Yes, it may be hard to do this if most of the best attorneys on Long Island, NY have been conflicted out. However, finding any person who can take your case is critical. This is a complex element of divorce law when it comes to proving to the court that this abuse took place.

Do not wait until you have all of the evidence possible to use against your spouse. Keep moving forward until you find an attorney who can represent you. Of course, we encourage you to contact us first, but there are many reputable divorce attorneys on Long Island, NY that can take your case.

Is Your Spouse Engaging in Other Abusive Divorce Tactics?

At Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., we take all abusive actions like this very seriously. It puts your rights on the line, and that is something we fight heavily against. The conflicting out tactic is often just one form of abuse from attorneys. Others may include:

  • Money control making it impossible for you to get legal support
  • Social media post abuse or contacting you in private messages with hateful or painful statements
  • Publicly shaming you
  • Controlling your relationship with family members
  • Manipulation of your friends, relatives and children, including parental alienation
  • Malicious parent syndrome aimed at tarnishing your reputation

If you have been abused in any way by your ex or you are struggling to find an attorney because of conflicting out, call us. Do not let an ex bully you.

Allow our highly skilled, compassionate, and aggressive legal team to work to protect your rights to legal support. Take a moment to check out our book, “Successful Divorce Strategies,” which incorporates positive resolution strategies and helpful methods to get through your divorce without abusive practices.

Set Up a Consultation and Case Evaluation with Our Divorce Attorneys Now

Our experienced attorneys are ready to fight for you. It starts with a thorough case evaluation where we can discuss any and all of the strategies your ex is employing to limit your ability to start over. Our attorneys are caring and compassionate because we know what can happen.

Call us for a no-cost, no-obligation consultation. Put Hornberger Verbitsky P.C. to work for you now. Call 631-923-1910 to speak to our Long Island, NY divorce lawyers.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

4 Ways Your Spouse Can Respond to Divorce Papers in NY

4 Ways Your Spouse Can Respond to Divorce Papers in NY

4 Ways Your Spouse Can Respond to Divorce Papers in NY

When you file for a divorce in the State of New York, your spouse has a few different ways they can respond after you serve them with divorce papers. How they respond directly sets the stage for what’s to come and how the next several months – or in some cases years – will play out. Here are four potential ways your spouse can respond and what you should know and how to prepare:

Free New York Divorce Lawyer Consultation

#1. Spouse Signs & Returns the Paperwork

If your spouse signs and returns your divorce papers, this means they are in agreement with everything listed in the petition and the divorce is uncontested. The agreement then gets sent to a judge for approval and the divorce decree is issued shortly after. This is usually the shortest and least expensive way to get a divorce in New York.

#2. Spouse Suggests Changes

Your spouse may also respond with an alternative agreement for you to review or their attorney may do so on their behalf. This process may go back and forth for some time while you hammer out the details about who gets what with regards to property division, child custody and visitation, and all the other details that need to be resolved to complete your divorce.

One method that is often employed when you and your spouse are on amicable terms, but have disagreements about the details is through divorce mediation. In mediation, you and your spouse work with a neutral, third-party mediator who facilitates communication and helps you arrive at mutually beneficial resolutions.

While it’s possible to negotiate with your spouse on your own without the help of a mediator or family lawyer, it is often not recommended. Emotions are often volatile during this time and it may be difficult for you to talk to your spouse about important issues like alimony or child custody without getting angry or sad. In addition, the details you work out now will affect your life for years and years down the road. One small mistake or omission here can have dramatically negative impact on your life for years to come. It can pay to have an experienced attorney who is looking out for your interests review any agreement before you sign away rights you may not even know you had.

Once you both agree on everything, the petition then goes in front of a judge like in the above scenario. The judge will finalize the divorce and both you and your spouse will be legally bound to its terms.

#3. Spouse Does Nothing

If your spouse doesn’t respond to the divorce petition or file any paperwork in relation to your case, it will be considered an uncontested divorce by default. In most situations, these cases are resolved in favor of the petitioner.

Even when there are children involved, if your spouse fails to respond to the notice of your divorce within 20 days of being properly served, you will likely be awarded physical custody and standard child support.

If you intend to pursue a divorce by default, you will need to prove to the judge presiding over your case that you made every reasonable effort to have your spouse served and that more than likely, they have seen the petition and have no intent to respond.

#4. Spouse Files A Notice of Appearance

The fourth thing your spouse can choose to do in response to being served divorce papers is file a Notice of Appearance. This means they contest one or more issues with the divorce and are requesting a hearing in front of a judge.

When this happens, the court will set the date of your first hearing and both you and your spouse will appear with your respective attorneys. At this stage, your lawyers may still be able to negotiate terms on behalf of you and your spouse to try one last time to avoid litigation.

If this isn’t successful, your case will go to court and each of your legal representatives will make a case on your behalf. Then, a judge makes a final decision that you both must abide by. If you or your spouse fail to adhere to court orders, you may face penalties like fines or possibly even jail time depending on the severity of the circumstances.

When To Contact an Experienced New York Divorce Attorney

If you are considering serving your spouse with divorce papers, it’s important to be aware of your rights and responsibilities before you take that step toward ending your marriage. At Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., we can help you navigate the process of filing a divorce petition and let you know what to expect at each stage.

Contact our office today to learn more about filing for divorce on Long Island, NY by dialing 631-923-1910 or by completing our quick online form and we’ll get right back to you to schedule an appointment to evaluate your case answer your important questions.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
js_loader

Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

Your Guide to an Emotionally Intelligent Divorce in NY

Your Guide to an Emotionally Intelligent Divorce in NY

Your Guide to an Emotionally Intelligent Divorce in NY

There’s no doubt that divorce is an emotionally charged event, no matter what side of the fence you’re on. Whether you’re the one initiating the divorce, or you were caught blindsided by your spouse’s divorce request, or even if you mutually agree that the divorce is the best course forward, it’s always an emotional event to recognize that what you once thought would be forever is going to end. No matter how long you have been together it can be difficult to imagine the rest of your life without the other person in it, even if you want it that way. For all the practical matters of divorce that have to be resolved, it is extremely difficult to take the emotions out of the equation.

But the fact of the matter is, there are some very important practical matters that have to be dealt with and the more emotional you or your spouse are, the less rational you become and this can definitely hurt you in the long run as you deal with the practical matters of divorce. It is seriously in your best interests to aim for an “emotionally intelligent” Long Island, NY divorce. Here’s what that means and how you can get there.

Free New York Divorce Lawyer Consultation

What Is an Emotionally Intelligent Divorce?

Emotional intelligence is a term that refers to a person’s ability to recognize their own emotions and express them in healthy ways. People who are emotionally intelligent have an abundance of empathy and are able to navigate relationships with other people more easily.

Instead of an angry, contentious, or jealous divorce, an emotionally intelligent one aims to resolve the dissolution of marriage with rational, well-thought out actions. Negative emotions are well-regulated in this type of divorce and both spouses are usually committed to processing their feelings with a therapist instead of taking it out on each other throughout the divorce process.

Components Of an Emotionally Intelligent Divorce

When your divorce goes smoothly, everyone benefits – especially your kids, if you have them. An emotionally intelligent separation allows you to work toward solutions that are in everyone’s best interests and helps keep exhausting fighting and expensive litigation to a minimum. Here are some of the main components of an emotionally intelligent divorce:

Emotional Awareness

Emotional awareness is the ability to understand and name your own emotions. Contrary to popular belief, this isn’t a skill people are born with – it has to be learned. If you struggle to describe how you feel or to put words to what you’re experiencing emotionally, you may need more help developing this awareness. An experienced therapist can help you process and express your feelings during this traumatic time

Empathy

Empathy is the ability to understand the emotions of other people and appreciate the position they’re in or what they might be going through. For some people, their sense of empathy is innately very strong. For others, it too is a skill that needs to be developed.

In an emotionally intelligent divorce, both spouses are able to go beyond their own feelings about the separation and empathize with the other. This allows them to better explore resolutions that benefit everyone and to release feelings of vindictiveness and revenge. If you can understand and express what your partner may be feeling, you are in a better position to work with them to resolve your differences in a mutually beneficial way.

Emotional Regulation

Emotional regulation is a core aspect of emotional intelligence in every context, especially when it comes to divorce. Even though child custody, property division or alimony disagreements may make you feel enraged or distraught, good emotional intelligence allows you to better process and regulate those emotions without lashing out at your spouse in an effort to hurt them. Lashing out will likely only put your spouse on the defensive, make them dig in their heels and escalate your disagreements.

For example, if you’re angry at your ex for having a new partner, you could go to the gym or out for a run to give you some physical relief from the adrenaline. What you shouldn’t do is try to get back at them by using mechanisms of your divorce, like being late to pick up your kids for visitation to inconvenience your ex.

Rational Actions

When a divorce is emotionally intelligent, the actions of both spouses are rational and well thought out. Neither is out to cause damage to the other and both are comfortable taking enough time to work through whatever feelings they have about a situation before making a decision.

Dissolving a marriage is a difficult process and the choices you make now can impact you and your family members for many years after the divorce agreement is signed. It’s imperative that your decisions are logical and aren’t made from a place of hurt, jealousy, or anger.

While considering and processing those feelings is important, you don’t want to act on them when you’re in an emotional state. Instead, choices are made based on observable fact and what’s best for all the people involved.

How To Get an Emotionally Intelligent Long Island, NY Divorce

The first step to creating an environment where you can have an emotionally intelligent divorce is contacting a qualified and experienced Long Island, NY divorce attorney. An experienced lawyer can help you understand the complexities of New York family law and will guide you through the process step by step, so you can reach the most beneficial resolution for the least amount of time, expense and hassle.

Contact Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. today to learn how to protect your family’s best interests throughout the divorce process by calling 631-923-1910 or filling out the short form on this page. Our team will schedule your free initial consultation and case evaluation where you can get answers to your important legal questions to help you move forward.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
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How to Navigate the Stages of Divorce in NY

How to Navigate the Stages of Divorce in NY

How to Navigate the Stages of Divorce in NY

For most people, getting a divorce doesn’t just happen all at once. It’s a process. There are different phases of divorce, from realizing your marriage is ending and going through the legal process, to grieving during and afterwards. Each of these phases can be overwhelming in their own ways but when combined, they create an intimidating big picture. But with the right support and advocacy, you can face the challenges ahead and pursue the best possible outcome for you and your family.

Here are the main stages of dissolving your marriage, what you can expect during each, and how to get qualified legal assistance you can trust during your Long Island, NY divorce.

Free New York Divorce Lawyer Consultation

The Mental Aspect of Divorce

The very first stage of getting a divorce is the mental one. You may not even know that you’re going through it or be able to pinpoint it. And your spouse might not even notice that anything has changed. This is the point at which you realize that you’re done with your relationship and it’s no longer worth salvaging or putting any effort into saving.

This realization can happen after a significant specific event, or it can arise gradually over time. Sometimes, a strained spouse will come to this realization after they have been working with a therapist, either alone or in  marriage counseling, and comes to realize that divorce is their only option. Or, a spouse simply realizes that the end of their relationship is imminent and no amount of counseling is going to change the end result.

In any case, while all divorces are emotional at some point, the Mental Aspect of Divorce is simply an intellectual decision that a relationship between spouses cannot be saved and you will both eventually be happier apart.

Announcing Your Intent to Divorce

The next stage of divorcing is letting your spouse know that you want to end your marriage. If your relationship has been on the rocks for some time, they may be expecting the announcement. But if they’ve been happy in the marriage and think everything is fine, it may come entirely out of the blue for them. If you’re not the one who initiated the divorce, you may feel blindsided by your spouse’s announcement that they want to end the marriage.

This won’t be easy for anyone involved, so take your time and ensure you are making the right decision and you have a good emotional support system to help you in the coming divorce process.

The Separation Phase of Divorce

Once divorce is out in the open and on the table, the process of physically separating begins. This can be a very tricky period, especially if you own a home and have children together. Often, it is assumed that the husband will vacate the premises and leave the wife and children to reside in the home until the divorce is final. This is not always the best solution for the person moving out. While it may be difficult emotionally, it is often critical to protecting your rights and assets that you do not move out until your divorce is final.

The Legal Matters Phase of Divorce

When you and/or your spouse hire an attorney, the legal process of dissolving your marriage starts. You may decide to consult with a lawyer before announcing the divorce to your spouse, or you may want to break the news first and then worry about getting legal advocacy later. No matter what your reasons for divorce, it’s rarely a bad idea to consult an attorney prior to discussing divorce with your spouse.

There are several steps to getting a divorce, and the more assets you own and children you have together, the longer this stage will take. It also takes longer if you and your spouse disagree on how to divide property or who will have custody and visitation of the kids.

The Resolution Phase of Divorce

Finally, once the judge issues a court order or approves your divorce agreement, the resolution stage of your divorce begins. This marks the end of legal and logistical issues between you and your now ex-spouse over your divorce. However, if you have children, it may take a while before everything is fully resolved. You’ll likely have to go through multiple hearings in this case, especially if your spouse is contentious and wants to continue litigation.

The Emotional Divorce Phase

The final stage of your divorce is the emotional one, when you at last put the failed relationship behind you. This can happen early on before, during and/or after the legal process, especially if you’re anxious for the marriage to end. In any event, this is usually the longest stage of the divorce process.

It may be years after your divorce before you reach this point. It generally takes longer to process the grief, frustration, and sadness that comes along with getting a divorce if you weren’t the one to initiate the separation, but even if you were, it’s still an emotional roller coaster. If this is the case for you and you don’t already have a therapist who you can talk to about how you’re feeling, now is the time to consider making an appointment.

You can also look for support groups in your area that are free to attend. Check with local churches, the court, or your divorce lawyer to find meetings on Long Island near you.

Hornberger Verbisky, P.C. is a veteran Long Island divorce law firm that can help you navigate the different stages of ending your marriage. Call today for your free initial consultation at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form on this page to sch

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

Are More Women Initiating Divorce in NY?

Are More Women Initiating Divorce in NY?

Are More Women Initiating Divorce in NY?

According to a recent survey by the World Population Review of people in New York, there are more divorced women than men. Below, we explore possible reasons for this and where you can get qualified legal help you can trust at whatever stage you are at in your divorce.

The Difference in Numbers

The Review suggests that even though there are more men living in New York than women, fewer of them currently describe their marital status as divorced. According to the survey data, about 10% of women are divorced, compared to only 7% of men. Even though the difference isn’t more than a few percentage points, the disparity is significant enough that it’s worth considering the potential causes and potentially contributing factors.

Here are some other notable statistics from the survey:

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  • Overall, divorce rates in New York have stayed the same over the last 10 years
  • There are more men who get married in New York, than women – 48% compared to 43%
  • Half of all couples divorcing in the state have children under the age of 18
  • No-fault divorce due to irreconcilable differences is the most common type of divorce in New York

Why Are There More Divorced Women in New York?

A look into what life is like for the average married woman in today’s society can offer clues as to what’s behind the decisions of women who divorce their husbands. While not all New York divorce cases initiated by women are caused by these issues, they are common enough that a pattern can be identified.

There are a lot of different things that may be contributing to the reason why more women are divorced in New York than men. Here are some of the most common issues couples face today that may be changing the landscape of who’s getting divorced and why.

Long Island, NY Women Are Overburdened

No longer are women just caring for the home and children in a marriage – many of them are also working to help make ends meet. This puts a lot of stress on the woman, especially if her spouse doesn’t contribute much to family and household tasks.

Even though women have largely stepped up to the plate in this new world where two incomes are often a necessity to run a household on Long Island, NY, many men consider domestic duties to still be the responsibility of the wife. In this situation, regardless of whether or not the woman works, she often still has to come home and make meals, take care of the children, and do household chores.

It’s easy for anyone to get burnt out when they’re doing so much and there’s no relief in sight. Many women who are doing it all are realizing that logistically, they’re already taking care of everything and they don’t need a spouse to help them do it. In this case, women are more likely to be the ones initiating the divorce.

NY Women are Earning More

A 2019 study by the University of Bath reported that husbands of wives who made more than 40% of the total household income had experienced psychological distress as a result.

The report indicated that the more money a wife earns, the more some husbands will be affected and potentially feel the most troubled when she provides him with complete financial support.

This jealousy can cause tension and arguments between spouses that make day to day living challenging. And over time, these fights can start to erode the relationship and cause irreparable damage. When men don’t feel as appreciated and feel like their spouse is bringing more value to the relationship than they are, they’re more likely to be the ones filing for divorce.

She’s No Longer Okay with Certain Behaviors

As women age, they often worry less about not having a partner in life – either because they’re more comfortable alone or more confident in their ability to attract someone. When this occurs, women often get less tolerant of certain behaviors that were more easily tolerated in the beginning of the relationship. This can be confusing and frustrating for men who aren’t doing anything differently or who haven’t changed.

Infidelity

Cheating is one of the most common causes of divorce in New York, regardless of gender. Not only does infidelity shatter the trust between two spouses, it also begins to erode the intimacy they once shared. Even when both partners have the intent to work things out, sometimes it’s not possible due to underlying feelings of hurt and betrayal.

Infidelity changes the entire relationship dynamic whether you want it to or not. Couples therapy may help, but it’s also often likely that the changes are permanent and one or both partners aren’t able to move on. In this case, separation is usually imminent, and spouses of either gender will initiate divorce because their partner cheated.

Call Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. Now For Legal Help

If you’re considering getting divorced, or your spouse has told you they want to end the marriage, you need to seek legal help as quickly as possible. Regardless of which side of the divorce you are on, it’s important to have the support of a qualified lawyer who can help you navigate the challenges that are ahead of you. The longer you delay, the higher the chance that your case will have a bad outcome.

Contact Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. now for more information about divorce laws in New York or to book a free initial consultation to discuss your legal options. Dial 631-923-1910 or fill out our short online contact form and we’ll get back to you right away.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

Key Divorce Worries at Every Age in NY

Key Divorce Worries at Every Age in NY

Key Divorce Worries at Every Age in NY

Getting divorced is emotionally and practically difficult and stressful no matter how old you are. However, the major concerns that couples face as they dissolve their marriages differ depending on what stage of life they are in, and so does what they want out of their divorces. Below, we discuss the top issues for people who are getting divorced on Long Island, NY in their 20s, 30s, 40s, and beyond.

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divorce concerns for people in their 20sTop Concerns for People Divorcing in Their 20s

Couples in their 20s are still relatively new at marriage and divorcing at this stage is considered very early. Many of these couples might not have had the chance yet to build significant wealth, create a large family, or establish an extensive and complicated life together when they’re looking at getting a divorce in their 20s.

The biggest concern for most people this age is coming out with their fair share of any property they bought while married. This is usually the house, which is one of the first major purchases couples make together and perhaps a car or cars. Dividing debt accrued during the marriage might also be an issue.

divorce concerns for people in their 30sTop Concerns for People Divorcing in Their 30s

Many couples in their 30s have started their families, so getting a divorce during this time often involves issues of child custody, visitation, and child support. These matters can be highly emotional and complex, and there’s a child at the center of it all with the potential to get hurt.

It’s not uncommon for divorcing couples in their 30s to have very contentious divorces in regards to child custody, especially when there are serious issues like drug use or domestic violence accusations involved. One spouse may try to use custody matters to gain control over the other or just to make their life miserable out of a desire for revenge.

divorce concerns for people in their 40sTop Concerns for People Divorcing in Their 40s

The older a couple gets before they pursue a divorce, the more their needs change with time. People getting divorced in their 40s have become accustomed to their way of living and may have even given up their career or stayed at home with the kids for many years. A divorce at 40 often puts people who haven’t provided for themselves for a long time in a difficult position having to re-enter the workforce or finding their own apartment to live in.

For a lot of older couples, alimony or spousal support is a chief concern, especially if one spouse earned markedly less than the other for the majority of the marriage. The nonworking spouse may be worried that they won’t have enough money to make ends meet living on their own and may only be able to survive if awarded alimony or spousal support for a period of time.

This (usually) temporary financial support allows people to go back to school, obtain additional job training, or seek other sources of income so they can manage on their own in time.

divorce concerns for people 50+Top Concerns for People Divorcing when 50+

Divorcing at 50 and beyond is colloquially known as a “gray divorce” and is more common now than in years past. The idea of divorce has become more commonplace and younger generations who grew up more comfortable with the concept of ending a marriage get older.

For seniors who are getting a divorce, one of the top concerns is maintaining access to their spouse’s retirement benefits. Couples who are married for a significant length of time usually add each other as beneficiaries on their IRAs or 401ks, and many spouses still have the right to a portion of that retirement savings just like they have a right to a portion of other property and assets accrued during the marriage.

How To Get Qualified Legal Help with Your Long Island, NY Divorce

No matter what your age is or what stage of life you’re in, if you’re faced with the possibility of divorce on Long Island, you need the help of a qualified, experienced attorney. At Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., we have the skills and experience to provide you with zealous legal representation from the start of your divorce to the final verdict.

We’ll work with you to secure the best outcome possible depending on your individual needs and the needs of your family. Contact our office today to book a consultation to discuss your case and the legal options that may be available to you by dialing 631-923-1910, Or, fill in the short form on this page and we’ll get right back to you to set up your free consultation and case evaluation.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
js_loader

Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

Securing Your Social Media from an Intrusive Partner in NY

Securing Your Social Media from an Intrusive Partner in NY

Securing Your Social Media from an Intrusive Partner in NY

The ubiquitous integration of social media into most people’s daily lives has made it critical for you to keep your accounts safe from prying eyes. For many people, social media is a way to share details of their life and connect with other people. What we all have to remember is that, even though we may we think we are sending a private message to our “friends”, if it’s on the Internet, there’s a record of it somewhere. Whether it’s Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Reddit or whatever other social media property you may use, what you post on social media can be used against you in court.

Learn more about how Social Media Can Hurt You in Your Divorce.

If you’re going through a contentious divorce and you suspect your spouse might be spying on you, securing your social media accounts and keeping a watchful eye on suspicious activity is even more imperative than ever before.

Below, we discuss some simple tips and tricks to help protect your social media accounts from a snooping spouse and what you can do to get qualified legal assistance with your New York divorce.

Free New York Divorce Lawyer Consultation

Max Out Your Social Media Privacy Settings

If your accounts are public, if you’re going through a divorce, now is the time for you to set them to Private. Research the privacy settings for each platform you use and if possible, use the strictest settings you can. You don’t want to post pictures or updates that you think your spouse isn’t going to see only to find out later that your privacy settings weren’t on and the post went public and your ex is using them against you in your divorce or child custody case.

Don’t Accept New Friend Requests

It’s common for spouses who want to spy to create fake accounts so they can pose as a friend and be accepted to your private friends lists. Be suspicious of sudden friend requests from people you haven’t spoken to since high school, people from forums you participate in but don’t regularly talk to, etc.

A great way to protect yourself is to only accept new friend requests from people who you’ve met in real life and know you can trust. If you’ve only met them online, there’s really no way to know who they are and if they’re someone you have complete and utter confidence they will not share information with your spouse.

Don’t ‘Check In’ Anywhere on Social Media

Many social media sites, like Facebook, give you the option to “check in” on the pages of physical places you go to in real life when you’re there. This is something you want to avoid doing, especially if you’re in the midst of a divorce or you suspect your ex may be watching you

“Checking in” shows people where you are, when you’re there, and how often you frequent those places. Anyone who wants to track you or see what you’re doing can look at that information and use it to piece together your habits, your family, and where you go during the day.

Even if you think your posts are set to private, check ins are usually public information. It may not be possible to see your pictures or personal messages, but if you check in to businesses, this information is usually posted on your public timeline.

Make Passwords Complex & Change Them Often

If you haven’t changed your passwords since your divorce (or since divorce proceedings were commenced), do that now. Your passwords should be long, complex, and changed frequently.

Make sure your new passwords aren’t anything your spouse would recognize, guess, or remember. Don’t make it a pet’s name, a child’s birthday, a parent’s name, or anything that’s personal to you. Your spouse likely knows the things important to you and can probably guess these kinds of passwords.

Ideally, your password will be something entirely random that isn’t likely to be cracked by anyone – for example, putting several words together that wouldn’t ordinarily fit that way can work well. Note that the longer your password is, the harder it will be for spy software to run through all the possible password combinations to find the right one.

Hire A Zealous New York Family Lawyer to Help You

Going through a divorce is tough and there’s not much that can lessen the emotional and psychological blow. There are, however a number of mistakes you can make at the start of your divorce and one of these is certainly making it easier for your spouse to spy on you.

The tips above are a good start, but you need comprehensive legal support when dissolving your marriage. There are a number of things you should do as soon as you learn of your divorce and only a team of experienced professionals on your side can guide you through the difficult challenges ahead and who can help advocate for your best interests.

Contact Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. today for more information about your legal options with a spying spouse or to book a free initial case consultation to speak with an experienced Long Island divorce lawyer. Call now at 631-923-1910 or fill out our short contact form and we’ll get right back to you.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
js_loader

Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.

How Long Island, NY Divorces Impact Mental Health

How Long Island, NY Divorces Impact Mental Health

How Long Island, NY Divorces Impact Mental Health

In recent years, awareness of mental health issues have increased across the nation. From anxiety and depression to eating and personality disorders and everything in between, people recognize that mental health is a serious and common issue affecting millions of people in the U.S. and around the world. In fact, according to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (www.nami.org),  “43.8 million adults experience mental illness in a given year. 1 in 5 adults in America experience a mental illness. Nearly 1 in 25 (10 million) adults in America live with a serious mental illness.”

It stands to reason that going through a traumatic event like a divorce, can intensify or bring on symptoms of mental health issues. This means more people are asking questions about how divorce impacts mental health. What can people who are getting divorced expect emotionally? Here’s what to know and how to get the emotional support you need during this challenging time.

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Research Shows Divorce Increases Anxiety, Depression & Alcohol Abuse

Research published by Cambridge University Press suggests that both divorce and legal separation put people at a greater risk for anxiety, depression, and alcohol abuse.

The study surveyed more than 2,000 people and was adjusted for factors like childhood trauma, financial hardship, and education. Overall, the research confirmed that divorce can have a significant and long-term negative impact on a person’s mental health.

What To Expect Emotionally When Getting a Divorce

Not only are divorces incredibly difficult financially and logistically – they’re also emotionally challenging. Regardless of which side of the divorce you’re on or whether you wanted it or not, you’re likely going to feel a range of both negative and positive emotions as you go through the process of dissolving your marriage.

During your divorce, you may:

  • Lose the desire to engage in activities you once enjoyed
  • Sleep more than usual or have a difficult time sleeping
  • Eat more or less than usual or have difficulty eating
  • Lose focus when completing important tasks at work
  • Have a stronger desire to drink alcohol
  • Not want to be around friends or family who may ask invasive questions
  • Feel lonely even when you’re around people
  • Not know how to sort through or experience your emotions

Mental health professionals suggest that you take some time to identify or name your emotions. Look for new ways to manage and talk through them instead of turning to alcohol, drugs, or other maladaptive coping mechanisms after divorce.

The Dangers of Drinking After Divorce

While drinking is more common after a divorce, it’s also risky for many reasons. Not only will your health be negatively impacted, you may also be putting your custody rights on the line.

If your ex-spouse finds evidence that you’ve been drinking excessively – with or without your children present – they could use this to file a motion seeking the removal of your custody rights. If drinking causes you to become more violent, your ex may also have sufficient grounds to take your children away on the basis of potential domestic violence.

Drinking is a form of self-medication that many people use to distract them from times of trauma. Instead of facing their problems head-on after a divorce, they drink their feelings about them away.

But by treating the root cause of these issues, you can avoid the situation becoming more serious and potentially losing income, custody rights, insurance, and more.

If you develop a drinking problem during or after your Long Island, NY divorce, you’re not alone. But it’s crucial that you get help as quickly as possible before your children or your future become impacted beyond repair. Consider going to a formal rehab center or an inpatient program that can also serve as a sort of “getaway” from the divorce and the people around you who remind you of it.

How To Get Qualified Mental Health & Legal Help

Being proactive about getting mental health and emotional support can help you better navigate going through your divorce or separation. A counselor or therapist can listen to you, identify toxic patterns, and give you tools to help you recover in a healthy way.

In situations where people need more help than what a counselor alone can give, a psychiatrist may be able to prescribe certain medications. These can reduce the symptoms of anxiety and depression and make it possible for people to function more normally during the emotional upheaval that getting divorced brings.

Call Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. Today for Help with Your Divorce

Beyond counseling and medication support, you also need experienced legal help when you’re going through a divorce. The decisions you make now will affect you now and in the future, so you need to understand your rights and where to get qualified legal and mental health support when you need it.

Contact our office today for a free initial case consultation by dialing 631-923-1910. Our veteran Long Island, NY divorce lawyers are available now to provide you with comprehensive guidance and legal support when you need it most.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

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About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Do 50% Of Long Island, NY Marriages Really End In Divorce?

Do 50% Of Long Island, NY Marriages Really End In Divorce?

Do 50% Of Long Island, NY Marriages Really End In Divorce?

It’s no secret that divorce rates are high. In the United States, it’s said that about 50% of marriages end in divorce. But what many people don’t realize is that this isn’t necessarily accurate, and the true divorce rate is actually lower. There are several factors that play into the divorce rate, including culture, education, gender, religion, and age.

Below, we take a more detailed look at divorce rates based on demographic, what contributes to divorces on Long Island, NY, and how you can get legal support if you’re considering or going through a divorce.

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The True Divorce Rate

Half of all marriages don’t end in divorce, contrary to common belief. This figure was created in the 1970s by researchers who believed that if 2% of couples continued to get divorced each year, the rate would eventually reach 50% and beyond.

What this figure fails to take into account, however, is things like changes in the public perception of divorce or the introduction of no-fault divorces. It also doesn’t factor in race, education, income, social status, and other things that impact how groups of people approach divorce.

The Washington Post reports how these issues have a major effect on divorce rates, suggesting that:

  • 38% of high school-educated people get divorced
  • Only 28% of college-educated people get divorced
  • Divorce rates for Black and Indigenous people are higher at 42% and 45%
  • Hispanic people have a lower rate of divorce at 29%
  • Asian people are the least likely to divorce, with a rate of just 17%

How Do Demographics Affect Divorces?

The cultural norms of a society clearly play a significant role in the divorce rate. What people believe about marriage and divorce, and if these things are rooted in their religion. For example, in countries where divorce is highly stigmatized, couples may be less likely to seek one, even if they are unhappy in their marriage. In other cultures, divorce may be more common, and couples may be more likely to view it as a viable option when they are facing marital problems.

In the figures above, you can see that college-educated people tend to get divorced at a lower rate than those who have lower levels of education. This is likely due to several factors, including the fact that educated couples tend to marry later in life and may have better communication skills and therefore may be more likely to be able to verbally resolve conflicts in their marriage. They may also be better equipped to deal with the financial challenges that often lead to marital problems.

Gender roles and age can also play a role in divorce rates. In societies where women have fewer rights and opportunities, they may be more likely to stay in abusive or unhappy marriages because they cannot leave or support themselves financially. Gender norms can further impact the way couples communicate and resolve conflict, with men being more likely to resort to violence and women being more likely to internalize marital problems.

Younger couples are less likely to have shared life experiences and may not have fully developed the communication and problem-solving skills needed to deal with marital problems. Young people may also be more impulsive and less likely to consider the long-term implications of divorce before deciding to end their marriage.

Should You Get Divorced?

If you’re considering ending your marriage, talking to an experienced divorce and family law attorney can help you understand the legal process and the potential long-term effects of a divorce on you, your spouse, and any children that may be involved.

If you have children, then you should also consider their best interests and seek professional advice from a therapist or other qualified professional to make sure that your next move is as beneficial for your family as possible. How you approach and communicate your impending divorce with your children is critical for how it may impact them emotionally and developmentally.

At Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C., we understand the nuance of divorce and can help you navigate the challenges that lie ahead, no matter how difficult. We have the experience needed to represent you during divorce settlement negotiations, or we can zealously advocate for you in court should your divorce need to be litigated.

To learn more about your legal options or to take the first step to starting a new life, contact our office at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form on this page. We serve clients throughout all of Long Island and nearby areas in New York.

GET YOUR FREE CONSULTATION TODAY
Call 631-923-1910 or fill in the form below

Get your complimentary consultation and case evaluation with our experienced attorneys today.

Your attorney will describe the many options available and determine together which is the right solution for you. By the end of this  conversation, we’ll all understand how we can best help you to move forward.

No Cost or Obligation

There is no cost or obligation for this initial consultation. It is simply an opportunity for us to get to know each other, answer your questions and learn if Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. is right the right law firm for you. Give us a call at 631-923-1910 or fill in the short form below for your free consultation and case evaluation.

All Fields Are Required

* indicates required

About the Author

Robert E. Hornberger, Esq., Founding Partner, Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.

  • Over 20 years practicing matrimonial law
  • Over 1,000 cases successfully resolved
  • Founder and Partner of Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C.
  • Experienced and compassionate Long Island Divorce Attorney, Family Law Attorney, and Divorce Mediator
  • Licensed to practice law in the State of New York
  • New York State Bar Association member
  • Nassau County Bar Association member
  • Suffolk County Bar Association member
  • “Super Lawyer” Metro Rising Star
  • Nominated Best of Long Island Divorce Attorney four consecutive years
  • Alternative Dispute Resolution Committee Contributor
  • Collaborative Law Association of New York – Former Director
  • Martindale Hubbell Distinguished Designation
  • America’s Most Honored Professionals – Top 5%
  • Lead Counsel Rated – Divorce Law
  • American Institute of Family Law Attorneys 10 Best
  • International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
  • Graduate of Hofstra University School of Law
  • Double Bachelor’s degrees in Philosophy, Politics & Law and History from SUNY Binghamton University
Divorce Lawyer Long Island New York
Google Review of divorce longisland
Melissa Rappa
Melissa Rappa
18:09 08 Feb 24
At one of the hardest and most stressful times of my life, it was so comforting to have a team at Hornberger and Verbitsky who ALWAYS responded in record speed to my questions, phone calls, emails or texts and who I felt really cared about helping me through this difficult time. It was a long few years and I am grateful to all of you. Thank you so much Rob, AnneMarie, Christine, Patty, Joan and Lawrence. Your guidance, professionalism and expertise is appreciated beyond measure.
Paul Carmichael
Paul Carmichael
16:21 11 Dec 23
I would give 6 stars if I could. I can't say enough good things about Robert and his firm. We were in a situation for over 2 years and I could have never made it through without Robert's experience and knowledge. He guided me through tough times when needed and his expertise could "read" the situation and make the next best move for me. He was tough when he needed to be tough (thankfully) and at the same time guided me through the process to make me feel comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. I would not want to go through this process without Robert and his team having my back. he helped move the case along and not waste any time or money. One last time, I 100% endorse Robert and his expertise.
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Successful Divorce Strategies Free eBook
Child Support & Spousal Maintenance Tools
Spousal Maintenance Calculator
Child Support Calculator
Hornberger Verbitsky, P.C. respects your right to privacy. We will never sell your information to any third party. Follow this link to read our full privacy policy.